Friday, August 31, 2007

Repeat Bidness: House of 1000 Corpses

House of 1000 Corpses

Release: 04/11/2003
DVD: 08/12/2003
Rated R
1 hour, 29 minutes

Matinee ($$$)

I can't believe this Stargazers! I finally start a blog and now my free-movie stream has all but dried up. Since I was denied a sneak peek into Rob Zombie's re-imagining of the classic horror film, "Halloween," I have decided to dig up one of the first reviews I ever wrote for the first film Zombie ever made. Without further adieu...

The debut picture from writer/director/musician Rob Zombie tells the story of four college kids traveling along the back roads of Texas (does any of this sound familiar?) on All Hallows Eve. Captain Spaulding, brilliantly performed by Sid Haig (Jackie Brown), runs the roadside Gasoline, Fried Chicken, and Horror Museum where the kids stop into to stock up for the last leg of their voyage home. The museum tour chronicles a local mass-murdering legend, Dr. Satan, and sparks the kids’ need to drive out to the remote killing grounds of the legend in the cold, rainy dead of night. One hitchhiker named Baby, played by Sheri Moon, and one flat tire later, the kids end up at the home of the Firefly family. After partaking in the Firefly Halloween celebration and getting the car repaired, the fun really begins.

I am going on record as saying this is perhaps one of the best and one of the worst horror films I have ever seen. Approximately two thirds of this film is edgy and phenomenal in its deliverance; the remaining portion is utter filth and a waste of good celluloid. Perhaps the darkest, most twisted character is Otis Firefly, creepily portrayed by Bill Moseley (*Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2). Otis will single handedly freak you out. He’s the answer of the question “What if Ted Nugent was insane, correction an insane mass murderer.” The gore and violence are wonderfully sick and twisted; the influences of many horror classics are plainly evident in this film. Unfortunately, many horrific horror film fumbles are also present. Zombie’s directing segues into a music video vantage with random cuts and digital effects unnecessary for the development of the story.

Dirty Undies

Sheri Moon is a sexy, beautiful woman who flaunts what she’s got in this flick. She has a brief scene of nudity scattered throughout the music video cuts. Her high-pitched joyful schoolgirl laughter intensified her intriguing debut performance. Bill Moseley makes Billy Bob Thornton seem sane and dull. Sid Haig is a dreadful delight as he single-handedly holds the record for profanity. He couldn’t open his mouth without making a sailor blush and I’d love to see him in more features. Overall “House’ is a very bloody and deliberately brutal film with a smidgeon of violence tossed in to help offset the blood. One last notable mention is the trip to the local ABC store with the ingenious logo.

The Money Shot
“House of 1000 Corpses” has something for every aficionado of the horror audience, and that is where it fails. In trying to make a dish palatable to all connoisseurs, Rob Zombie inevitably created a film with a lot of indigestible tripe. All that said, it is still a must see. I recommend seeing this movie simply on the well-developed and unique characterizations; what you try to get from the rest of the flick is done so at your own risk.

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  1. We need some new material!!!

  2. The floodgates are brimming with new film reviews. Just wait and see!