Thursday, March 27, 2008

The Spank Bank: Summer Glau

Thanks again to all you stargazers who voted in the poll that decided the subject of this post. I love watching movies but I especially love watching television and films featuring certain charismatic women and men. Everyone has those special actors or actresses that draw them to a movie. Hell, I'd go see Scary Movie XVII if my flagship Spank Bank'r Matt Damon was starring but we've been there.

The second inductee of the Spank Bank doesn't have quite the extensive
portfolio as her predecessor but that doesn't mean she is any less deserving. On the contrary, I feel this young woman hasn't gotten enough attention. I hope my post only furthers her career and, if it does, she remembers me fondly. My newest Spank Bank inductee is the one and only:

The First Time My Eyes Met:
Third season of the television show Angel in the episode "Waiting in the Wings." Summer played the Prima Ballerina. Sure, a minor role, but those who know me know I am a sucker for a talented dancer (she used to be a prima ballerina). I didn't know I could be down with ballet until she pirouetted into my life.

She had me at ‘Hello’: As River Tam in the shamefully short-lived TV series Firefly and the follow-up feature Serenity, Summer proved she could be delicate, deadly and bizarre. I was smitten within minutes of River's awakening from the box. It also helps that River was given the chance to do things like this:

and this:

Sexiest Movie/TV Moment:
Playing the cyborg Cameron Phillips on Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles takes her game to a whole new level. You'd think playing an emotionless hunk of metal would leave viewers cold but damn if she ain't hot doing it! I already have many favorite moments but the best goes somewhat as follows:

Sarah's ex-lover Charley storms out of the garage after talking with Cameron. Sarah enters and asks what just happened.

Cameron matter-of-factly replies, "I freak him the hell out."
Sarah responds, "I bet you do."

Oh boy does she, and trust me, its in all the good ways.

Let’s Never Speak of This Again: Some people would look at Summer's limited career and probably think that the Sci-Fi television movie Mammoth and the ABC Family remake of the Initiation of Sarah are things she'd like to forget. As someone who's seen both of these, I'd have to say she has nothing to be ashamed of thus far. Sure Mammoth was cheesy but damn it was funny. In Sarah she was absolutely scrumptious in a cast full of yum-o! Here's to more quality roles!

It Brings a Smile to My Face: Whenever a role has her smiling or laughing. Summer is a champ at playing...peculiar characters; characters who typically do not have reason to laugh or be happy. For me it's quite refreshing to see moments that pep her up.

My Biggest Regret: Seeing as how I've only missed three of her guest TV spots and one minor film role, my choices are slim. Still, having not seen the episodes on The Unit in which she portrayed Crystal Burns is my biggest regret. I don't really know anything about the show except that Dennis "Cerrano" Haysbert stars. But this is reason enough to kick myself for missing out:

Her Winning Feature: Tough decision. I love her dazzling smile and I'm putty for cute, pouty lips so you'd think it'd be a no-brainer. However, they come in second to her legs. Whether she's playing an emotionless cyborg or an emotionally scarred killing vixen, it's the way she moves that truly mesmerizes me. The combo of dancer skills and sexy gams are my kryptonite.

If I could walk in his shoes: I'd have to replace Adam Baldwin in Serenity. The moment would be from the video above around the 1:13 mark. I by no means have a pain fetish, but I think I could enjoy it if she were in charge.

Most Anticipated Upcoming Project: I must confess. I was only mildly interested in Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles when I first heard about it. Then I saw the comic book ad with Summer. I had to tune in. While there's no legit buzz on her upcoming projects, here's hoping the show is picked up for a full season so I can enjoy her weekly.

There is a rumor that Joss Whedon is developing a ballet movie called The Serving Girl where Summer would be the star. Hey, Joss let me know if you need help getting this project going.

My Dream of Working with the lovely Summer: I can see it now, I'm lounging on a plush leather couch, the only illumination in the room comes from my laptop screen and the glow of the fire. Summer enters, gracefully gliding across the room to sit beside me. We have been brought together by our mutual friend Joss to work out a few of the finer details on her first starring role in one of her dream pics, a western. To make sure we don't get too, um, stiff on the couch, she gets me up to stretch. Before I know it, she's teaching me to tango. We dance, we talk of plots for a romance vehicle for her, there is electricity in the air. Then, as if in the Chronicles or Firefly, there's this discordant ringing filling our head, drowning out the music.

Damn, it's my alarm. I hit snooze and head back to the couch...

Ahh, now where were we?


P.S.- Summer if you're reading this, I love me some westerns and would totally develop an idea that would help you expand your range and avoid a lifetime of type-casting. Seriously, call me.

Large Association of Movie Blogs


  1. I think SG also had a recurring role in the t.v. series The 4400 but I've only seen the first season of that and can't specifically speak to her involvement. That's such a great fight scene from Serenity: she did almost all of the stunts herself, except for the flipflop down the stairs. Kicking a guy in the head from around a pole when he's standing behind you: priceless.

  2. Thanks for stopping by. You're right SG did have a role on The 4400. I've seen a couple of those eps but want to watch the whole show from start-finish sometime.

    I wound up watching Serenity and an ep or two of Firefly again in prep for this. I love watching her kick butt! Terminator doesn't have her doing complicated moves but she's awesome at that unflinching facade.

  3. Thanks. You're right SG did have a role on The 4400. I've seen a couple of those episodes but want to watch the whole show from start-finish sometimes.

  4. I loved her guest spots on The 4400. I can't believe you made a post called The Spank Bank. Lol.

  5. The 4400 is still skulking in my NFQ. My original title was The Mad Cream, but the wife wasn't having it, haha!

    I am overdue for another deposit into the Spank Bank. Maybe next week will be the week I get to it.