Trailer Trash: July 13 of 2012

Slim, I mean, the slimmest of slim, pickings are out this week. Guess that's a good thing since nearly all of us are saving our pennies for the Dark Knight to rise in theaters everywhere next week!!!

Ice Age: Continental Drift Oh, for the love of all that is holy, they've made another one of these damned things! I shouldn't be surprised, nor should I be mad. I mean, someone's got to cut John Leguizamo a regular check since I rarely see his lovable mug in live-action movies any more. However, my pocket change will not be contributing to this check, since I've never been inclined to see any of the Ice Age movies. 

Verdict:  Exercise the Right to Cinematic Celibacy. 

See you at the movies next week!

MILF Rendezvous: Swamp Thing

The vault’s fascination with superheroes continues. We inducted some high profile superheroes last week, but not all heroes are created equal. Today we’re dredging the mire in search of a more obscure defender.

Swamp Thing

Dr. Alec Holland (Ray Wise) has a crazy idea to create a plant with an animal’s instincts that will allow it to thrive in the harshest of conditions. It must not be too crazy since the government has hidden him and his sister Linda (Nannette Brown) deep in the swamp to conduct their experiments. Also lurking in the muck is a team of militants working for the evil Dr. Arcane (Louis Jourdan) who believes Holland’s work is the key to immortality. Shortly after replacement government employee Alice Cable (Adrienne Barbeau) arrives, the Hollands make an astounding breakthrough. Arcane and his crew quickly move in to steal the formula, but a laboratory accident leaves Holland for dead and Alice on the run with the last notebook of vital research. With Arcane’s men hot on her heels, Alice finds a protector in the massive and monstrous Swamp Thing (Dick Durock).

Rendezvous...

MMM: Who Dug Dido Up?

Morning stargazers. Driving into work, the very first song that came on my radio this morning was White Flag by Dido. Not sure what prompted the nostalgia, but it was comforting to hear the mellow tune. Watching the video for the first time in years I'd forgotten David Boreanaz was Dido's ex-beau. If you're up for a little reminiscing, be it for Dido's song or Boreanaz's bushy head o' hair, why not take a listen?

Dido - White Flag

Heard any songs resurrected by the radio lately that caught you by surprise?

MILF Rendezvous: Superman

Recently watching Spider-Man, coupled with my building excitement to see The Amazing Spider-Man and The Dark Knight Rises, has got me in the superhero mood. I hope you’re feeling it too because all of July will be dedicated to the superhero genre! I chose Superman for two reasons; it’s the grandaddy of all superhero movies we see today and Ned Beatty, who portrays Lex’s henchman Otis, turns 74 today.

Superman

 
With his world of Krypton facing imminent destruction, Jor-El (Marlon Brando) fashions a ship to send his only son to another galaxy to live on the planet Earth. The young child is found and adopted by the Kent family and raised as their own. On his eighteenth birthday, young Clark (Jeff East) is summoned by a Kryptonian crystal and sets about learning his true heritage. Ten years later whenever trouble erupts in Metropolis, mild-mannered reporter Clark Kent (Christopher Reeve) slips out of sight and takes to the skies as Superman, defender of truth, justice and the American way, not to mention crush of intrepid reporter Lois Lane (Margot Kidder) and nemesis of the evil mastermind Lex Luthor (Gene Hackman).

Rendezvous...

Trailer Trash: July 3 of 2012

I feel like we just had a slew of new movies to come out. That's right, we did! This whole Fourth of July being in the middle of the week is just throwing me completely off. It's also throwing off theaters seeing as how one movie opens today, another on Thursday and yet another on Friday. Got that? Neither do I.

The Amazing Spider-Man (07.03) I wasn't thrilled with Marvel rebooting the Spider-man franchise so quickly. I was satisfied with the work Raimi and Co. had done. But alas, all things must change and, with summer flicks, they must evolve with younger, hipper stars to reel in young money. That said, I'm still stoked to see this. Okay, I'm most excited about Emma Stone, but Rhys Ifans, Sally Field and Denis Leary should make great entertainment. And Andrew Garfield isn't too bad himself. 

Verdict: Moist With Antici...Pation! 

Katy Perry: Part of Me (07.05) Yes, I am a grown ass man and yes I do intend to see Katy's concert-biography flick.  At least she's old enough to have had actual shit happen during her rise to stardom unlike a certain other, less impressive teen heartthrob. Not that I need to justify going, I just need to not feel awkward being a grown ass man in a theater full of teens.




Verdict: It's Friday, I Don't Want to be Alone.

Savages (07.06) Jeez, does this look fucking painful! I can't say that I'm a huge fan of all of Oliver Stone's projects, but I haven't been this annoyed with a trailer since the Smurfs teaser. I believe I'm most annoyed because I expect something more intriguing from Stone and this just seems like a lot of flash and bother. I'll probably rent this at some point if I hear enough positive buzz, but I can use these two plus hours to go enjoy Spider-Man or Katy Perry a second time instead of taking a risk on this.


Verdict:  Exercise the Right to Cinematic Celibacy. 


Happy Fourth of July everyone!

MILF Rendezvous: Spider-Man

It was exactly ten years and two months ago that Spider-Man first crawled his way onto screens nationwide. Four years, ten months, two weeks and one day (plus or minus a few days) have passed since he scurried into the dark recesses of those same screens. Today the reboot infests theaters everywhere and a lot of us ol’ school Spidey fans are still grumbling over whether such a quick reboot was warranted. I never minded the idea of The Amazing Spider-Man, and not just because of my healthy fascination with Emma Stone. I made peace with the inevitability of reboots and remakes long ago, but that doesn’t mean I forget about their forefathers.

Spider-Man

Peter Parker (Tobey Maguire) is a walking cliche; the nerdy high school kid hated by most who’s helplessly in love with the hottest girl in school, Mary Jane “MJ” Watson (Kirsten Dunst). Everyone sees Pete as a loser except for MJ who doesn’t see him at all, his Aunt May (Rosemary Harris) and Uncle Ben (Cliff Robertson) who raise him, and his best friend Harry (James Franco) who’s an outsider himself. Peter’s lame world is literally turned upside down and sideways when he’s bitten by a genetically engineered super-spider during on a field trip. He recovers to find he’s acquired spider-like powers, but with great power comes great responsibility, and a personal tragedy inspires him to fight crime on the mean streets of NYC. Not a moment too soon since Norman Osborn (Willem Dafoe), Harry’s dad and an outcast himself, has undergone a more twisted, destructive transformation.

Rendezvous...

MMM: Push Push Push Push the Start

Good morning stargazers! I don't know about you, but I'm dragging. Not sure why, I had a fairly relaxing weekend. Maybe with the Fourth of July being on Wednesday is making it hard to focus. Either way, I need something peppy to get moving and since today is Devin Star Tailes, a.k.a. Dev, 23rd birthday, I thought she should have the honor to rev us up. Enjoy.

Dev - In The Dark