Friday, August 26, 2011

Trailer Trash: The August 26th Quickie

I'll be damned if it isn't the end of August. I swear I was eating hot dogs on the Fourth just a couple weeks ago. As the saying goes, time flies when you have shit to do. Wait, that doesn't sound right. Still applies. Anyways, one thing on my must-do list, assuming Hurricane Irene visits, is to go to the movies and catch up on some movies I've missed over the past few weeks. That is unless the new releases (see IMDb ) are must-see offerings. Let's have a look see.   

Colombiana I admit I've already seen this, but had I not gotten to see an advance screening, I wouldn't have sliced into my cheddar to rush out this weekend. Luc Besson is can't-miss when it comes to penning and producing action flicks. That said, it'd be much easier to wrap a foil Juicy Fruit wrapper around Saldana than it is to wrap my head around her as an unstoppable killer.

Verdict:  It's Friday, I Don't Want to be Alone.

Our Idiot Brother Very little about this premise appeals to me, but my man-crush on Paul Rudd won't let me skip it. Even through all the scruffiness he's got going on, I can't say no to that face...or Zooey Deschanel's...or Elizabeth Banks-able Banks'... or Rashida Jones'. You get the point; it's a great cast in a questionable movie. I've committed to far worse.

Verdict:  It's Friday, I Don't Want to be Alone.

Don't Be Afraid of the Dark How can I put this? Katie and I haven't been...cinematic in quite some time. It's a long story, but I have my reasons. I'd be willing to put aside our familial issues if her latest film looked more, well, interesting. I'd have to put my faith in Guillermo del Toro's writing to take this up a notch, but from what the trailers have shown I'm only confident the creature effects will be worth the price of admission.

Verdict:  It's Friday, I Don't Want to be Alone.

With so many middling movies, it looks like I am safe to play catch up on last week's Fright Night and the much-anticipated TrollHunter. What's on your watch list for the weekend?

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Monday, August 22, 2011


Good almost-afternoon folks. I've gotten a late start today, but hopefully it won't leave me scrambling to catch up for the rest of the week. With the fall television season starting back up, I'm starting to wonder if there will be any new shows worth watching and if my old favorites will keep me entertained. I also find myself wishing some shows would make a comeback like Jemaine and Bret's HBO series about their band, Flight of the Conchords. Since that's not happening, let's remember some of the good times. 
Flight of the Conchords:
 Hiphopopotamus vs. Rhymenoceros

Carol Brown

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Friday, August 19, 2011

Trailer Trash: The August 19th Quickie

I'm sure many of you noticed last week's Trailer Trash was absent. I apologize and hope this week's proves doubly entertaining for you. August offers up another four new releases to feast our senses upon, at least that's what IMDb reports. The big question is are any of them worth watching?  

Conan the Barbarian With all the sword-fighting and carnage and mayhem, you'd think I'd be chomping at the bit, whipped into an action-crazed frenzy to see Conan. I'm not really feeling this, though. The R-rating will inevitably draw me into the theater, but I guess I just prefer a Conan that speaks fewer words, wears less eye liner and uses less product.  

Verdict:  It's Friday, I Don't Want to be Alone.

Fright Night Colin Farrell has a knack for playing a douchebag; just check out Horrible Bosses if you need proof. You can't get more douchey than playing a vampire neighbor named Jerry who's hellbent of snacking on all your friends and family. With David Tennant and my favorite up-and-comer Anton Yelchin being pitted against the Irishman, I can't think of a single reason why I'd miss this!


Verdict: Moist With Antici...Pation!

One Day Jeez, if this film is even one-tenth as tedious as its trailer, audiences are in for one long ass day at the theater. I enjoy the more vampy Anne Hathaway from recent films like Valentine's Day and Love and Other Drugs to this dull and dowdy version. She's put her Princess Diaries days behind her and so should everyone else.


Verdict:  It's Friday, I Don't Want to be Alone.

Spy Kids: All the Time in the World in 4D Smell-o-Vision? That's your big selling point. It's not enough I have to wear dumbass 3D glasses to see a piss-poor film, but now I have to get whiff of a postcard during the film? Unless there's a scratch-n-sniff patch of Alba's snatch, I'm not seeing many audiences clamoring to experience this gimmick. Sad thing is, there probably is a scent patch to smell the talking dog's anus.

Verdict:  Exercise the Right to Cinematic Celibacy.

And on that note, I'm calling it a week. I've got a lot of friends to catch up with, lots of movies to watch and for some reason the weekend is still only two days long! Catch ya on the flip side.

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Monday, August 15, 2011

MMM: Damn Dirty Apes

Yesterday I went to experience Rise of the Planet of the Apes and discover if all the hype was warranted. While the content of the song isn't apropos, the video is a perfect choice to honor a movie about apes running loose in the streets, fucking everyone up as they go.

The Bloodhound Gang - The Bad Touch

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Monday, August 8, 2011

MMM: Just Dance

Time to get up and get moving. The song that's going to accomplish that today is one I had intended to post months ago, but it was not available for blog sharing at the time.Good things come to those who wait, however, and it doesn't get much better than watching the lead singer of Radiohead, Thom Yorke, break it down as he croons the word to Lotus Flower. Pay attention to the 1:15 mark to see him work my favorite move of the video.

Radiohead - Lotus Flower

What are you waiting for? Just dance!

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Friday, August 5, 2011

Trailer Trash: The August 5th Quickie

Welcome to August stargazers! It's that transitional month between the last summer hopefuls and the beginning of the deluge of movies that didn't cut the mustard as blockbusters or award contenders. The last few weeks at the movies have been surprisingly enjoyable, but will this week's releases keep up the trend? According to IMDb that task rests upon these two releases:

The Change-Up At every turn I hear serious hate towards The Change-Up. Hell, even I was down on it when I first read the premise. Then I saw the trailers and my deep affection for the comedic talents of Jason Bateman, Ryan Reynolds and Leslie Mann overruled all sensibility. The bathroom humor will no doubt be too much, but I'm going to watch these three rise above the lowest common denominator.
Verdict: Moist With Antici...Pation!

Rise of the Planet of the Apes I've wrestled with my feelings for Rise. First thoughts are that it looks awesome and who doesn't love James Franco? Then again, all that crazy monkey action in the trailer might just be the last fifteen minutes of a plodding two-hour film. I took one last look at the trailer this morning and, fuck it! This is man vs. monkey and may the best primate win!

Verdict: Moist With Antici...Pation!

I still haven't gotten around to seeing Captain America, but I've got a free ticket I've been saving for just such an occasion. Since I've actually already seen The Change-Up, that should give me plenty of time to see Cap in action. What will you venture out to see this weekend?

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Monday, August 1, 2011

MMM: This Place About To...

Hello, hello stargazers. It's already the first day of August! Looking back over the summer, I've been disappointed with the concert offerings in my area. The few that I have attended have been awesome; I just wish there had been a couple more.

Lucky for me, the last of my must-see concerts is just around the corner. Ke-dollar sign-Ha is coming to town in just a little over a week! I still haven't bought my ticket because it may be 110 degrees like it was this time last year and this is an outdoor venue made almost entirely of concrete. Honestly, who designs an amphitheater to resemble a brick fucking oven?

My second problem is that it's been a bitch to find anyone else who wants to go. Can you believe that?! Say what you will about her music, but you can guarantee it's going to be one interesting show. It's worth the price of admission just for the people watching. So who's with me? Are you up for going insane and showing your Hanes?  

Ke$ha - Blow

Not sure why, but I love that James Van Der Beek is in that video.

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